Potty training hell

That's where I am right now, folks. My daughter Ava, who will be four at the end of June, refuses to use the potty.

There are many reasons why this is frustrating. One is that she is in complete control of her bladder and bowels. For at least the last six months she has informed me when she has to pee or poop. In the past few months she taught herself to put on her cloth diapers, and when they were wet, she would put them in the laundry room to be cleaned.

She uses this situation as a manipulation tool, waiting until nap or bedtime to poop, specifically to postpone the sleep time. I've tried everything I know, and nothing has worked.

Last week, after consulting a group of women that I'm involved in a positive discipline group with, I decided to bite the bullet and get rid of the diapers. I told Ava that she was big enough now, and that I have faith in her ability to use the potty instead of a diaper.

Saturday night I boxed all the diapers up and hid them in my closet, and moved her changing table out to the garage. I laid out all her cute little underwear and let her choose her favorite yesterday, Hanna Andersson cupcakes. We pushed liquids all day, and had her sit on her little potty and the regular toilet with a seat inserted. As each hour passed, I went from excited to annoyed to worried.

Finally I found myself staring at the clock at 6:55 and could not decide how we were going to handle her approaching bedtime. I didn't want her to think/know that if she held all day, there was a PullUp available at bedtime. Just like Prudence from Once Upon a Potty, she sat and sat and sat. A teeny bit trickled out and we were so encouraged, but then she cried and cried and said she didn't want to do anymore.

Wouldn't you know, the minute I stepped out of the room, she relaxed and practically filled the little potty! I was so excited, we all were, and we did the potty dance and cheered for her, and then we put a PullUp on her and she pooped in it and we didn't even care! I was completely relieved that she had peed, and excited to start today with a girl that uses the potty.

And then...she refused to sit on the potty this morning before we left to take her brothers to school. She refused at school, and she refused at Target. Even armed with the potty insert to put on a regular sized toilet, she was not having it.

We have been home for almost three hours and she has sat on the potty numerous times and continued refusing. She is taking small sips of her ChickFilA lemonade but apparently her will is strong enough to hold 8 ounces of lemonade plus four ounces of water.

It's 12:45 now and we're about to try again. Wish us luck, because I don't want to be in this particular hell for much longer.